I am a WARRIOR.
Seriously. I was just looking at one of my favorite blogs, The R House and I noticed that she changed around her links and such. Under INFERTILITY WARRIORS, my blog was listed.
Now, I am a fairly emotional person. I get teary eyed when I see my family after a long time away, I also cry when I have to leave them again. I cry in sappy movies. I sometimes cry when I sing a hymn or when I hear a strong testimony. And I cry when I ponder on my life.
I cry when I see Eve sleeping at night (we peek in on her sleeping every single night.)
I sometimes cry when I see her playing with her Daddy or clapping for Pat-A-Cake or when she is dancing. I am overcome.
And then I remember what is was like before she was here. I cried. A LOT.
I cried when I saw pregnant women. I cried when I had a negative pregnancy test. I cried when I found out each of my sisters was pregnant. I cried when I started my period. I cried when I heard talks about motherhood and parenthood. I cried when I saw families with children. I cried when I saw a nursing mother. I cried when I heard about mothers who would throw their babies away. I cried when I miscarried.
I cried.
I cried.
Tears of sorrow. and grief. and pain.
But, we overcame that very long trial and now my tears are
of the utmost
JOY. and Gratitude. and humility.
My heart goes out to those warriors still struggling with infertility.
But, it feels good to be considered a warrior. I feel triumphant. Thanks to the R house for helping me remember that I am a WARRIOR.
Seriously. I was just looking at one of my favorite blogs, The R House and I noticed that she changed around her links and such. Under INFERTILITY WARRIORS, my blog was listed.
Now, I am a fairly emotional person. I get teary eyed when I see my family after a long time away, I also cry when I have to leave them again. I cry in sappy movies. I sometimes cry when I sing a hymn or when I hear a strong testimony. And I cry when I ponder on my life.
I cry when I see Eve sleeping at night (we peek in on her sleeping every single night.)
I sometimes cry when I see her playing with her Daddy or clapping for Pat-A-Cake or when she is dancing. I am overcome.
And then I remember what is was like before she was here. I cried. A LOT.
I cried when I saw pregnant women. I cried when I had a negative pregnancy test. I cried when I found out each of my sisters was pregnant. I cried when I started my period. I cried when I heard talks about motherhood and parenthood. I cried when I saw families with children. I cried when I saw a nursing mother. I cried when I heard about mothers who would throw their babies away. I cried when I miscarried.
I cried.
I cried.
Tears of sorrow. and grief. and pain.
But, we overcame that very long trial and now my tears are
of the utmost
JOY. and Gratitude. and humility.
My heart goes out to those warriors still struggling with infertility.
But, it feels good to be considered a warrior. I feel triumphant. Thanks to the R house for helping me remember that I am a WARRIOR.
8 comments:
You are right. You are a warrior! As so am I when loss after loss I would keep on going, hoping, praying for another child. Just think if I would of gave up after my 2nd,3rd, 4th or 5th loss. I would not have MY miracle baby. We need to always remember how strong we really are. Heavenly Father has blessed us greatly!
We all have our "mommy warrior" calling, and I think you have endured yours well. I think the most important thing is, even in the midst of our trials, is to search for the real meaning and lesson that is supposed to be meant for you.
You are an AMAZING woman and I love ya!
That was one of my favorite posts by you. Seriously. I think sometimes we don't know the burdens each of us carries. And I am so proud of you. You project happiness and gratefulness.
I am struggling a lot these days, with one thing in particular and I don't talk about it much. Its just hidden because there aren't a whole lot of people who can relate. 99% of my friends just don't understand. And I cry a lot too. Often alone, so, thank you for that post. I'm hoping I will cry tears of joy soon too. Love ya!
She's a lucky girl, that beautiful baby of yours.
I cried while I read that! I am so happy that you got to fulfill your calling and that you never gave up!
I cried too.
Last year, you bore your testimony in the Odessa branch, with Eve in your sling. Your testimony that day was flat out amazing. I've always seen you as a warrior. You spoke about your love for the pioneers, the women that struggled.
Beautifully said! Thanks for being such a great example to me and a shoulder to cry on in the past. Aren't we blessed? Life is incredible!
You made me cry too, Becca. Thank you.
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