Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Of love


"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." Mother Teresa

Lately, I have been very judgmental toward myself. Mostly about my physical appearance.
I have been struggling with the way my body looks and how I feel. I can't quite resolve the conflict inside of me between just being happy with who I am as a mother and a wife and the desire to be a better looking woman.

"Love is the flower you've got to let grow." John Lennon

The other day, I took some self portraits. When I was looking through most of them I thought how unattractive I was. Then as I was washing dishes one evening and thinking of my lack of beauty I began to realize how horrible I had been acting. My negative self image was infecting me with hateful feelings toward myself as a person.
So, in order to combat all the negativity and destructive feelings, I decided to do a post about love. Love of self. Love of MYSELF. To let the "flower" grow.
This is in no way meant to be a vain post. It is is no way meant to be a "puffed up," prideful post. It is simply me shouting out to the world, the things I love about myself.
It is also a post of encouragement. I think that we, as women need to take a moment to boost ourselves up. I know that we should not focus on physical beauty alone but I think it might be okay to look upon our outward appearance every once in a while. So, just for this post I am going to share the physical characteristics that I like about myself.

1. My hair. I really do love my hair. It is stick straight and shiny. I cannot remember the last time I blow dried it. (I only blow my bangs out which takes all of 1-2 minutes.) When I let it air dry, it turns out the way it is in the picture at the top of this post. I am lucky.
2. My feet. I have always thought my feet were cute, except for about 4 months during my pregnancy. I have had other people tell me I have pretty feet too.
3. My smile. I was voted "best smile" in our high school superlatives. I am fortunate that my teeth are pretty straight, considering the fact that I have never had braces. My cheeks are nice and round and jolly.
4. My skin. I don't wear makeup very much and when I do, it is just eye makeup. I have a little powder I use for my face occasionally, but generally, my skin looks pretty good and I don't have to use it.
5. My hands. They remind me of my mother's hands.


"The art of love is largely the the art of persistence." Albert Ellis


Now, I just need to remain persistent in loving myself. Persistent in serving others, for that will help me become more beautiful. Persistent in faith of the Lord for that will sustain my inner and outer beauty.


Elder Richard G. Scott said,
"So many of our sisters are disheartened, even discouraged, and disillusioned. Others are in serious trouble because of the choices they make. Satan has unleashed a seductive campaign to undermine the sanctity of womanhood, to deceive the daughters of God and divert them from their divine destiny. He well knows women are the compassionate, self-sacrificing, loving power that binds together the human family. He would focus their interests solely on their physical attributes and rob them of their exalting roles as wives and mothers. He has convinced many of the lie that they are third-class citizens in the kingdom of God. That falsehood has led some to trade their divinely given femininity for male coarseness."

I hope we all recognize our exalting roles as wives and mothers and recognize the beauty that comes with those divine responsibilities.

And that we love ourselves a little bit more.


17 comments:

Lizzie said...

Awe Becca! I love ya! I think you are gorgeous. I was alway jealous of you at Ricks, such a ray of sunshine. I know how you feel though... carrying those little cuties does a number to your body. Keep on smiling!

Unknown said...

Wow I would have never guessed. Can I just tell you that I have always thought of you as beautiful? I remember talking with friends at girls camp about how awesome and beautiful you were. We wanted to grow up to be just like you. We wanted to grow up to BE you. Self perception is a funny thing...

Brock and Kristina said...

Becs. I've noticed all of those beautiful things about you....except for your toes. It has probably been a really long time since I've seen your toes. But really....your hair, skin, smile, and your eyes are beautiful. You are like SUPER talented too. I wish I were as talented as you. You have many great and wonderful qualities....keep those in mind!!!! Don't let the adversary let you think otherwise!!! Or else you are letting him win. Love ya!

Mim said...

Becca! I LOVED this post!!! I enjoyed reading about every last beautiful part of you, because you are nothing less than absolutely lovely. I have always loved all those features and MORE about you--your eyes and lips and ankles, and aside from your physical beauty, you have one of the most beautiful souls I have ever known. You are a light, and a person that is constantly lifting those around you. I just wish I could be near you more often. I love that quote by E. Scott, and remember the first time I heard it it truly touched me. I have ALWAYS struggled to feel beautiful, and so I can totally relate to you in that way, but I'm inspired by your resolve to overcome those crappy feelings. You are a star, Becca.

Carrie said...

Thanks for that post, I definitely have very similar issues with my self-esteem. Bless you in your journey to self-love!

Courtney and Nate said...

1. I think you're gorgeous, always have.
2. I would kill to have any of those qualities you listed.
3. I know what you mean though...My self perception never changes. In high school, when I was a size 2, I looked at myself and saw a fat, unattractive girl. Then when I gained (lots of) weight in college, I saw the same girl, but thought, man I was so stupid to think I was fat and ugly in high school. Then when I gained weight when I was pregnant, I thought, man I was so stupid to think that I was fat and ugly in college. Now I keep thinking, man, I wish I was a size 2. And I will probably always do that.
4. I remember someone telling me that they look in the mirror every morning and tell themselves they are beautiful, and the two weeks that I did the same thing I felt great about myself!
5. Did I mention that you're my idol?

Super B said...

Thanks to everyone for all the sweet comments. I am so blessed to know so many great and loving friends!! Now, all of you go and write a post about what you LOVE about YOURSELVES. I know I could list a lot about all of you!!!

Anonymous said...

I can't even begin to explain how honest and intense this post was...and how many of us women out there need to find the love for ourselves that you are finding for yourself. thank you for sharing your journey with us!

xoxo

jrnelson said...

Becca, reading all these wonderful comments brings tears to my eyes!! You are an amazing person, I was just thinking today about what people would say about me when I die. I hope I have as many wonderful comments as you have here! You truly are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside. You have so much to offer others and you offer it freely. I, along with all these other women, have similar feelings. We really do need to remember our worth as women and mothers and what important roles we play on this earth. Thanks for the uplifting post. I love you sis!

Deidre said...

Becs!!

I am so proud of you. This post was very courageous and vulnerable. You are an amazing woman that I highly respected as a teenager and continue to respect even though I simply see glimpses of your life. You are beautiful! Your face glows with a joy that lights up every picture I see (and I am sure every room you enter). And your wealth of talent always amazes me. I hope I can be half as creative and talented as you are.

Don&Stacy&Boys said...

Becca you ARE beautiful inside and out. I think we can be our own worst critics. Good for you for recognizing that you need to work on being postive with yourself. You are loved and beautiful not only because of how you look, but because of who you are!

Jen and Alec said...

What a great post-- it shows how a beautiful woman can also be humble. Man, I wish I had your skin.

The Scott and Camille Neilson Family said...

What a great post! You truly are a beautiful person inside and out! Love you!

Anonymous said...

This is really powerful Becca~ Thank you for sharing! You are truly beautiful!

Juli said...

I've always thought you were beautiful. You do have a great smile and I LOVE your hair. Mine is always so frizzy. Isn't it funny how we are always harder on ourselves than others are on us?

Unknown said...

Our precious Becca,

How is it possible that you don't see your beauty-inward and outward????

I've never heard anyone who knows you who doesn't comment on your serenity, beauty, and loveliness. Every part of you is a gift from God. You are wonderfully made. Those who know you, know this personally.

You are always an inspiration to me. Love, Chris

Unknown said...

I forgot to sing this to you:

I think you're wonderful.
I think you're marvelous.
I think you're beautiful and magical and filled with curiosity....and dreams!

Love, Chris